now what?

what'cha ya gonna do...

thats the question? i have no idea what is next in our lives. we were going to be parents for a whole 5 weeks, but then that was taken away in a matter of 10 hours, and then we were going to buy a house, but then we backed out. when will something come to us that is good? or even amazing. who knows, but the waiting game has been really annoying lately.

lately, i have just been in a funk. tired of drama that people stir up because they want to be selfish.

i believe in letting people live their own lives, and there is nothing you can do to stop them from living it. i learned that from a cousin who chose drugs and alcohol over a healthly life. her first time in rehab, she was a 17 year old. how sad is that right?

I dont have time for people who chose that life style, hence the reason her and i hardly every talk. she finally told me she was sorry (a year after it happened) for choosing to be wasted/high or whatever else she was at the time of my wedding and not coming to it because she was to blasted out of her mind to even stay sober for ONE day. oh well, it was better off and she has to live with the guilt about the choice she made that day.

i need to get out of my funk and get my ass working towards a goal.

i got it. i am gonna start running on monday after work.

here we gooo